25 THINGS YOU SHOULD HAVE LEARNED BY MIDDLE AGE:
1. If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out.
2. Don’t worry about what people think; they don’t do it very often.
3. Going to church/temple/mosque doesn’t make you religious any more
than standing in a garage makes you a car.
4. It ain’t the jeans that make your butt look fat.
5. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite Government program.
10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.
13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
14. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.
16. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the
waist change places.
18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
19. Junk is something you’ve kept for years and throw away three
weeks before you need it.
20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a
mistake when you make it again.
22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
23. Thou shall not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
24. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.
25. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never
tried before.
Thought you might enjoy these pictures of my two taking a bath. Always a good time when in the water. Getting in or getting out is a whole story into itself. Smile!
Getting hair wet!
Splashing in the bath makes me even cuter!
One can’t take a bath without the other wanting to get in as well.
This was fun and it really fit me. I find that to just as entertaining as when they are way off base. Give it a try by clicking here.
Here are my results:
You are a person who approaches their finances aggressively and with purpose. You make sure you have covered every angle by consulting the best professionals, then move in for the attack. (Very True)
Preferring a more casual appearance, you are more comfortable in jeans and a t-shirt than in a suit. You don’t like over dressing for any occasion, although you never look scruffy. (hmmm… not sure about the not looking scruffy but the rest is Very True)
You are aggressive in business, but tend to take the backseat when it comes to your personal life. You are more comfortable talking about work than relationships. (Almost… depends on who I’m talking to, though My Husband would say I was aggressive about getting him. GRIN)
You value highly what is important to you. Some people may find your possessions a little out of fashion, but you don’t mind as they appeal to your taste. (Very True, particularly the ‘out of fashion’ GRIN)
A good listener. You are comfortable allowing others to take the spotlight and share their adventures. You are protective about your friendship and ensure the best for your friends. (True!)
You are a no-nonsense, practical person. You make sure that you are there when your friends need you, and like to solve their problems for them. (Definitely)
Carnival of Recipe time again. Got this recipe from Secrets of Slow Cooking. Would get it going at lunch time and it would be ready at dinner. I used it as a meal by itself with rolls and a salad. Hmmm. Now did I add the salad to this one or the other soup? Either way, my family enjoyed it.
Ingredients:
2 cans (14 ½ ounces each) beef broth
1 can (16 ounces) Great Northern beans, rinsed and drained
1 can (14 ½ ounces) diced tomatoes, undrained
2 medium zucchini, quartered lengthwise and sliced
1 tbls olive oil
1 ½ tsp minced garlic
½ tsp dried basil leaves
½ tsp dried oregano leaves
½ cup tubettie, ditilini or small shell pasta, uncooked
½ cup garlic seasoned croutons
½ cup grated Asiago or Romano cheese
3 tbls chopped fresh basil or Italian parsley (optional)
Directions:
1. Combine broth, beans, tomatoes with juice, zucchini, oil, garlic, dried basil, and oregano in slow cooker; mix well. Cover; cook on LOW 3 to 4 hours.
2. Stir in pasta. Cover; continue cooking on LOW 1 hour or until pasta is tender.
3. Serve soup with croutons and cheese. Garnish with fresh basil, if desired.
Four former U.S. Presidents are caught in a tornado,and off they whirled to OZ.
They finally make it to the Emerald City and came before the Great Wizard. “What brings you before the great wizard of Oz?”
Jimmy Carter stepped forward timidly:” I’ve come for some courage.”
“No problem!” says the Wizard. “Who is next?”
Ronald Reagan steps forward, “Well………I…….I think I need a heart.”
“Done,” says the Wizard. “Who comes next before the great and powerful Oz?”
Up stepped George Bush sadly and said, “I’m told by the American people that I need a brain.”
“I’ve heard – it’s true!” says the Wizard. “Consider it done.”
There is a great silence in the hall. Bill Clinton is just standing there, looking around, but doesn’t say a word.
Irritated, the Wizard finally asks, “What do you want?”
Bill asks, “Is Dorothy here?”
Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter.
Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger co-worker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one.
As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong.
Gasping for breath, she replied, “When I see two gas men running as hard as you two were, I figured I’d better run too!”
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