Yep, more food humor…
EGGS
When something starts pecking its way out of the shell, the egg is probably past its prime.
DAIRY PRODUCTS
Milk is spoiled when it starts to look like yogurt. Yogurt is spoiled
when it starts to look like cottage cheese. Cottage cheese is spoiled
when it starts to look like regular cheese. Regular cheese is nothing
but spoiled milk anyway and can’t get any more spoiled than it is
already. Cheddar cheese is spoiled when you think it is blue cheese
but you realize you’ve never purchased that kind.
MAYONNAISE
If it makes you violently ill after you eat it, the mayonnaise is
spoiled.
FROZEN FOODS
Frozen foods that have become an integral part of the defrosting
problem in your freezer compartment will probably be spoiled – (or
wrecked anyway) by the time you pry them out with a kitchen knife.
EXPIRATION DATES
This is NOT a marketing ploy to encourage you to throw away perfectly
good food so that you’ll spend more on groceries. Perhaps you’d
benefit by having a calendar in your kitchen.
MEAT
If opening the refrigerator door causes stray animals from a
three-block radius to congregate outside your house, the meat is
spoiled.
