Happy Mother’s Day

Something to make you smile as you sit and go through the blogs…

Child Sent to Bed
A small boy is sent to bed by his mother…
[Five minutes later]
“Mom…”
“What?”
“I’m thirsty. Can you bring me a glass of water?”
“No. You had your chance. Lights out.”
[Five minutes later]
“Mom…”
“WHAT?”
“I’m THIRSTY…Can I have a glass of water??”
“I told you NO! If you ask again I’ll have to spank you!!”
[Five minutes later]
“Mommm…”
“WHAT??!!”
“When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a glass of water?”

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“I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.” – Phyllis Diller
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“Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.” – Phyllis Diller
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“If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?” – Milton Berle
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“It’s not easy being a mother. If it were easy, fathers would do it.” – The Golden Girls
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“If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylum would be filled with mothers.” – Edgar Watson Howe
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“The mother of three notoriously unruly youngsters was asked whether or not she’d have children if she had it to do over again. ‘Yes’, she replied ‘but not the same ones.’” – David Finkelstein
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“Mothers of teenagers know why animals eat their young” – Unknown
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“Any child can tell you that the sole purpose of a middle name is so he can tell when he’s really in trouble.”- Dennis Fakes
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“Raising a kid is part joy and part guerilla warfare.” – Ed Asner
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“Children are gleeful barbarians.” – Joseph Morgenstern
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“The hand that rocks the cradle usually is attached to someone who isn’t getting enough sleep.” – John Fiebig
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“I’d like to be the ideal mother, but I’m too busy raising my kids.” – Unknown
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“Child rearing myth #1: Labour ends when the baby is born.” – Unknown
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“Children are a great comfort in your old age. And they help you reach it faster, too.” – Lionel Kaufman